the strength of a man

"The depth of a man's character is not measured by his physical strength but by the depth of his nobility."

In today’s society, there is a serious misconception amongst men that yells “The louder you are, the more muscular you are and the more women you sleep with, the better of a man you are!” Well, I would like to challenge that distorted perception of reality and set the record straight from a female perspective. I often see so many men trying to prove they are “good enough” even when they have to compromise their character or the best interests of others to get their point across. So I would like to clarify what truly is the strength of a man.

Strength is not found in the man who has the most muscular body and who can bench press the most weight. Strength is found in the man who although he is strong, he doesn’t need to bang on his chest and proclaim it to the world. A man is strong when he has a quiet confidence to him. He doesn’t need to prove his point to others because he believes in himself and knows what God sees in him and that’s all that matters. 

Strength is not found in the man who believes his masculinity is determined by how many women he can “conquer” in the bedroom or in his mind as he undresses them with his eyes. At the root of those behaviors lies an insecure little boy longing to know he is good enough and he is worth loving. A real man with true strength knows he is good enough and has enough to offer a real woman in a committed relationship. He doesn’t need to rack up numbers and brag to his friends about how many women he’s slept with. He doesn’t need to hide behind a computer screen lusting over porn videos or throwing dollar bills at some woman in a strip club, because he is too afraid of real commitment and genuine relationship. Strength is found in the man who although he could be settling for cheap forms of love, decides not to sell himself short and give into that garbage, because he wants to stay consumed with his wife or remain pure until he has one. 

Strength is not found in the man who can bully and intimidate those who are weaker than him by his cutting words or over-powering actions. Strength is found in the man who although he has the ability to physically hurt others and demolish their feelings, decides to stoop below those who are weaker and lift them up with kindness and encouragement.

Men, want to know what real women consider to be true strength? We consider true strength the ability to be humble even when you have every right to proclaim from the rooftops how great you are; to be loyal and have integrity even though she might not ever know you’re lusting after other women; to be gracious and kind even when other people don’t deserve it and it would be so easy for you to “put them in their place” and show them who's "boss." Strength is in your ability to fight selfish tendencies and push yourself to be the best man you can be - especially when no one is watching. It's in your ability to be a humble leader who leads by example with selfless love.

Strong is the man who has seen Jesus' example and is living his life in correspondence to that.

To all the men who are already living their lives this way and are actively trying to really be strong for those around you, thank you. Thank you for all the sacrifices you've made and times you've denied your flesh to be the man you are today.