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the social media game I refuse to play...


Social media keeps our lives spinning 100 miles an hour and it seems the rules are always changing.  Right now the name of the game is "prove your worth and your life exciting." I can't seem to get through an outing without being photographed or recorded on video. It seems like every time I turn around, someone is holding out their phone, trying relentlessly to get the perfect boomerang for the story or perfect selfie for their profile picture.

And that's fine.

Look, the point of this post is not to bash social media. I have had my fair share of doing all of those things and probably will again sooner or later.

We can't judge those people because we don't always know them or their story.

Maybe it is an insecure person who often updates their profile picture because the interaction on the photo is how they feel good about themselves.

Or maybe it's someone who almost lost their life to cancer. Maybe surviving created a desire to document everything in detail; to really enjoy the moment and make the most of their second chance.

It's not for us to judge.

But I would like to challenge us with this: is what we are doing for ourselves or for social media? 

If we want to comment on something, we should comment on it. To delete a comment later because it didn't get any "likes" or engagement and we don't want to be embarrassed by "rejection" is pathetic. If you want to say it, SAY IT.

If we want to update our profile picture because of the short-term attention-high of people's interaction with us, our motives are wrong. If we want to update our profile picture, UPDATE THE FREAKING PICTURE... (and don't delete it later because it didn't get the feedback you'd hoped!)

If you want to tell someone they look beautiful, do it without hoping it gets you noticed or they reciprocate and comment back on your picture.

If you want to follow someone, FOLLOW THEM. They don't need to follow you back if their content is important to you.

If you want to share your heart through your writing, music, videos, photography or whatever, DO IT. But not if the only reason is to "earn value" based on response.

If you want to tag your friends, do it for you and them. To savor the memory. Not because your friends + their friends = a lot of a likes.

If you want to respond to what someone said, do so because you care about them or because what they wrote was important. Don't do it to "boost" your post to the top of other's newsfeed in hopes of more notice.

Write the blog because it brings your own mind clarity. Share it. Not for attention, but because it might bring hope or insight to another.

Encourage and compliment others because who they are and what they think matters. Not only because you want to be seen or validated.

Take the photo because it makes you happy. Post it for the Grandma who gets a kick out of seeing what's going on in your life or for the memory you're time-stamping.

Social media can be a wonderful thing.

But use it for you. Don't lose yourself to it.

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